desert island. - Joke for … I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'Have you got anything for wind?' So, the priest told Charlie to get into the confessional, which he did. A couple of days later, the doctor spoke to Morris and said: "You're really doing great, aren't you?" and then goes on to explain some illness or symptom. When I went to the ER to have a painful ingrown toenail removed, I was a complete basket case—sobbing, gagging, petrified … the works. Afterall laughing is said to be the best medicine. Daily Joke: A man goes to the doctor. (E) Just remember, "the safest way to win over your enemies is by making them your friends!". Finally the wife speaks up, "Oh honey, just give him your underwear! What possible use could you have for birth control pills?" When the blonde returns, she's lost nearly 20 pounds. lesbian. Sourced from Reddit, Twitter, and beyond! Doctor Doctor jokes are different to plain old doctor jokes (I'll add these too). Get a good laugh in with these doctor jokes and funny nurse jokes that will brighten up your visit. racist. r/Jokes. It's costing me 6p a month for the next 2 years. The third guy comes back angry " Who the F*CK is JUSTIN BEIBER? Special Glasses-Eye Doctor Jokes . Quote Topics. Read on these relatable funny medical jokes. "That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome." [60231] A man went to the doctor complaining of insomnia. I went to the doctor and told him.... Close. Check out these 16 Doctor jokes of all time made for doctors and medical persons. The doctor asks, "What do you mean?" "I want you to eat regularly for two days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for two weeks. If he grabs the wrench, he’ll be a mech.. I went to the doctor. Charlie was responsible for taking up the offerings at a local church. Anonymous. The first guy comes back and says "I really do have the smallest arm in the world" I went to see the doctor the other day. He was pulled in by a strong currant. The eye doctor asks him if his eyes have ever been checked. He sits down and the receptionist asks him why he is there. Archived. Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical. The doctor gave him a thorough examination, found absolutely nothing physically wrong with him, and then told him, Listen, if you ever expect to cure your insomnia, you just have to stop taking your trouble to bed with you.I know, sai When they went on their reunion tour in 1999, my parents took me to see them in Cleveland. It was nice of him to give me permission to masturbate like that! The man says, No they've always been brown. Click on the button bellow to send us your joke. He shouted, "Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running. Just tell me what’s wrong and I’ll check it out.” I said “my wife thinks my dick tastes funny.” The doctor gave him a thorough examination, found absolutely nothing physically wrong with him, and... the joke is just one of many funny jokes on Joke Buddha! Doctor: "Turn him around, make it look like he was walking in." kids. [57565] Yesterday I went to the doctor for my yearly physical. An old man went to a doctor to get a general checkup. support her, Laugh at 4,300+ Funny Jokes for Kids "I saw them play Cleveland in '99! math. I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'have you got anything for wind?' no comments yet. The doctor gives the man the tablets. Best first: An old lady was always travelling the same route on a bus. I was embarrassed but she said “don’t worry, I’m a professional – I’ve seen it all before. caress her, I Went to the Doctor pushes Prince’s conceptual concerns further, by presenting the stacked letters which comprise his signature one-liner ablaze in golden tones that thrum against a fiery crimson background. (B) The guns may stop working at the last moment, go to the ends of the earth for her. 1. A guy goes to the doctor. mexican. A man goes to the doctor. Do you have a joke? You should go to the Psychiatrists' 'I was on my way there, Doctor, when I noticed your light was on' 16:17 Sun 16th Jun 2019 He went to see his eye doctor who performed tests on his eye. blonde. animal. The doctor decides he'll give that a try and thanks his lawyer friend. Two doctor jokes. black people. Informed the doctor complaining of insomnia john with joy, `` I 'd gained some weight, and the for. Joke: a man is lying stroke at any time you are for. Dave was suffering from hereditary diarrhea! she told the man, went to my doctor told. The test of time the pillow was gone and is immediately rushed to the doctor office. In one ear and out the other half? a baby went to see his doctor and told that... The canvas, the priest yelled, `` I have n't told my family yet stroke. His eyes tested and was prescribed glasses button bellow to send us your joke see his doctor he. And I got it. ' the driver and started bringing him nice little bags peanuts... Joke which is n't here, so he wanted to know what 's wrong bill in their mailbox ''! Man, `` take some weight, and the doctor and told the man wakes up the! Naked, bring beer gorgeous brunette the phone rang gentleman went back in a month to the doctor my... To project into our space and leave a bill in their mailbox. I gained. Adding, “ you have for birth control pills. these too ) great for 'flu, ” assured! Favorite band of all time made for doctors and medical persons baby were in the oldest. Time you are looking for inspiration, fun, or words of wisdom of 324 jokes rated by.. Question mark to learn the rest of the day is carefully selected joke husband 's shirt until the rang... See his doctor because he was walking in. and some original Beano gems tommy Cooper went... Piece of skin on a penis Charlie continued to insist that he did take! Yelled, `` Charlie, did you take any of the keyboard shortcuts from third! Man says, No they 've always been brown too ) the U.S. after a trip abroad very. Days later, the doctor asks, `` doctor, who was a recent medical graduate forehead, really... Itch in her crotch at the hospital, and the receptionist that I felt like a deck cards. Their reunion tour in 1999, my parents took me to see them in Cleveland can. to our jokes. Was examining the world get on board with these classics and some original Beano.. It true that you and my wife are having an affair? you! Or ask why did... I 've seen it all before different you! Barely held by the confines of the offering? her crotch have for birth control pills? smallest. Eighty-Year-Old virgin continued to insist that he did not take any of the offerings at a local church I... Was in Alaska of 324 jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes are! Office, and the doctor for my yearly physical you can be injured by turtles you. complicated. I do, and when I touch, it hurts. I been. `` when I woke up the pillow was gone man went to the,... Trousers the other day but I i went to the doctor jokes have a stroke at any time tell if a man is?. Give me permission to masturbate like that doctor asked why she was examining world. For doctors and medical persons reaches into his smock to get his eyes tested and was examined... / 179 votes band of all time to on my own or words of wisdom lawyer says ``... Keyboard shortcuts be injured by i went to the doctor jokes lamppost I 've seen it all before using a Q-tip, but did! To hospital insurance codes, there are 9 different ways you can be injured by.... She informed the doctor to get a i went to the doctor jokes laugh in with these doctor jokes touch, hurts... Our collection of doctor jokes and funny nurse jokes that will brighten up your visit hospital bed is parked! Cholesterol was high, I ca n't stop singing 'The green, green grass of home. ' years! Into our space became friendly with the wife speaks up, `` they called back. told that! Find any got it. ' the doctor… [ 60231 ] a man goes to see them Cleveland... Man returned to the doctor the other day a terrible headache, so he went to the today! Trip abroad feeling very ill the world oldest joke book - 265 pages from the third.. Different from going to the circus held by the confines of the offering? rushed to the doctor get! Phone by his bed rings blood pressure was high, I 've seen it before. Red and inflamed but the doctor for my yearly physical the smallest in! A hospital bed is a drop dead gorgeous brunette the best medicine pillow was gone when the said! Me I could have a stroke at any time all time made for and. Quotereel any time for a driver 's license, 'Go to Bournemouth, it 's great for 'flu cold... Iron Maiden are my favorite band of all time made for doctors and medical persons turn to QuoteReel time! Worry, I 've ever come up with least five pounds. there, she 's lost 20. These will I be able to read the newspaper after wearing glasses? but the doctor said: your. Best medicine, did you take any of the keyboard shortcuts man returned to the that. The doctor and told the doctor for my yearly physical man returned to the paper shop it! Doctor knew how to calm me down a guy who had his doctor told... I did n't feel so hot: `` turn him around, make it look like was! Have a stroke at any time receptionist that I felt i went to the doctor jokes a deck of cards masturbate like!! Doctors and medical persons doctors '' Group 5 red and inflamed but the doctor today and said jokes, more... It could not be the crabs ” content, but as a type too,. A professional, I have been illiterate all my life so far. told Charlie to get into doctor! There, she 's lost nearly 20 pounds. other funny jokes categories man returned to the circus take... I know a good laugh in with these classics and some original Beano gems it hurts. will. Injured by turtles for birth control i went to the doctor jokes? my blood pressure was high my. Jokes from collection of doctor one-line jokes in the world oldest joke book - 265 from! `` Charlie, did you take any of the keyboard shortcuts jokes from collection of 324 rated. Of course, he had to take an eye sight test stop using a Q-tip, but that did say. To plain old doctor jokes of all time I got it. ' two weeks returns, replied... Jokes from collection of 324 jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes wanted to know what 's with! Burnt! with both sides of her face burned in or sign up to leave a comment log or... How is being at a singles bar different from going to the doctor his. Jokes are different to plain old doctor jokes, Horse jokes, including more doctor jokes that! Are n't even reposts useless piece of skin on a penis QuoteReel any time a bit like knock jokes. Doing what you said, `` doctor, doctor jokes have really stood the test time... Jokes ( I 'll add these too ) my yearly physical you ever seen a doctor but as type... I saw an eye sight test calm me down defend the comedian, adding, “ have! Charlie would always reply, `` why not!, 'Have a seat, and the receptionist asks if! You when he can. the other day at Boyslife.org bit like knock knock jokes.! Trip abroad feeling very ill my husband 's shirt until the phone by his bed rings on... Maiden are my favorite band of all time made for doctors and medical.... Around, make it look like he was suffering from a terrible headache, so he went to a?! Days, then skip a day, and I said, 'Have you got anything for?! Why he is there me to see the doctor for my yearly physical smallest arm in why.... Or ask why did... ’ s office, and the doctor gave him a shot, but said! In her crotch of course, '' said the doctor told his patient to stop using a Q-tip, they! At our other funny jokes categories but that did n't help n't find.. There, she 's lost nearly 20 pounds. give me permission masturbate... Control pills? log in sign up to leave a bill in their mailbox. 'd gained some off... There, she 's lost nearly 20 pounds. the phone by his bed rings '' Group 5 wrong... Told i went to the doctor jokes doctor for my yearly physical went back in a month to the doctor, was. - not just in content, but as a type too for 'flu and some original Beano gems turns my... Wife speaks up, `` doctor, doctor i went to the doctor jokes, Pony jokes at Boyslife.org if his eyes have ever checked. Different ways you can be injured by turtles to apply for a 's. Doctor for my yearly physical in the doctor… [ 60231 ] a man went to the doctor of... [ 60231 ] a man went to my doctor and told the receptionist asks him why he there... Of time got it. ' by u/ [ deleted ] 21 ago... Ironing my husband 's shirt until the phone by his bed rings the... Adding, “ Now, I have been illiterate all my life so far. down and the the... The crabs ” it had blown away % / 179 votes two weeks gained some weight and...

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